Wicked Women: The Mean Girls of Literature

Tina Fey's Mean Girls, starring the likes of Lindsay Lohan and Amanda Seyfried, is apparently 10 years old today. At my 10th birthday party a group of my friends and I watched the movie in awe, giddy at its rudeness and delighted that 'that girl from Parent Trap who played twins' was in another film. Today, the internet has consequently exploded with #fetch hashtags and reminiscent Regina George quotes/memes. In response, For Books Sake have published a guest post discussing their favourite mean girls of literature, including the likes of Blair of Gossip Girl to Mrs Danvers in Rebecca.

This article has got me thinking about my own favourite evil women in literature, the 'life ruiners' alike Regina George who may have been overseen. So, I present to you my own list of literary Mean Girls:

Victoria in Zofloya, or The Moor by Charlotte Dacre

The mere thought of the female protagonist in Charlotte Dacre's 1806 novel makes me shudder. Victoria becomes a life ruiner several times over under the control of the devilish Zofloya; she's jealous, a bit sex crazy (maybe even a rapist), torturer, and savage killer of innocent Lillia (cos she doesn't even go here! Meaning: she's stolen Victoria's Henriquez...I had to fit that quote in somewhere!?) Altogether a bit of a...you know...rhymes with hyco witch?

Miss Havisham in Great Expectations by Charles Dickens

Poor Pip is the target of Miss Havisham's plans for revenge on mankind, pursuing his broken heart through her adopted daughter, Estella. Havisham, however, is owed perhaps more sympathy - left at the altar, she is ultimately denied the Victorian right to fulfilled womanhood (children), and becomes a recluse living in the suspended moment of what was meant to be her wedding day. No pink Wednesdays for Havisham...just the discoloured white of her decaying wedding dress every single day of the week. Not so fetch.

Medea in Medea by Euripides

A couple of thousand years later, Medea still appears as evil as ever. Jealous of Jason and his new love, she kills their children and taunts him with their bloody bodies. As you do.

Tamora in Titus Andronicus by William Shakespeare

Tamora, Queen of the Goths, is out for vicious means of revenge in this bloody Bard play - and, considering the death of her eldest son in the play's early scenes, she does seem to have motive. Evil nonetheless.

Choc Lit: A selection of chocolate-themed reads for Easter

Easter, for me, is about chocolate (Lie - everyday is about chocolate isn't it?). Anyway, Easter Day is a remarkable day when I am presented with a range of chocolatey treats by family members which I must stare at, drool for, and dutifully decide what time it is appropriate to guiltily crack open the first egg (11am approx. by my standards). Chocolate is also linked to books - there are the book awards sponsored by Galaxy, and even a publisher I found online aiming to find books only suitable to be read with a side helping of chocolate treats (I know, genius marketing ploy, isn't it?)

Anywho, I thought I would write a (long-overdue) blog post especially for Easter about pieces of literature which fixate on chocolate almost as much as I do everyday.

Chocolat by Joanne Harris 

Let's start with the obvious - this 1999 novel is about Vianne Rocher, a woman who opens a chocolate shop in a grumpy French village. It seems a poignant choice for Easter reading too - as much of the plot's tension comes from the village Church's disapproval of the indulgence represented by the chocolate sold by Rocher during Lent.

Admittedly, I haven't actually read this novel although I thought it was a bit too obvious to leave out of the selection in this post. I have, however, watched the film version in the hope of seeing Johnny Depp - only to be very disappointed because he only turns up as a sort of folk-hero chocolate bandit towards the end.




Charlie and the Chocolate Factory by Roald Dahl 

And how could I have forgotten this wonderful book? Charlie and the Chocolate Factory is one of my favourite children's books, along side the rest of Dahl's work. If you don't know the plot (how could you NOT?), it follows a young poor boy called Charlie who received a Golden Ticket to go to the elusive and exclusive Wonka Factory. Did anyone else feel extremely jealous when Augustus Gloop fell in that chocolate river? Nope? Just me then?

It's a tale that has been made into a feature film twice - the eccentric factory-owner Willy Wonka first played by Gene Wilder in 1971 and then Johnny Depp in 2005 (I am starting to develop a conspiracy theory that Depp likes to make films about cocoa treats...or is that just me?).











'Chocs' by Carol Ann Duffy

Let's not forget poetry either - I have found this great little poem by Duffy which describes the experience of tucking into a box of Terry's Moonlight - the excitement of the 'electrifying rustle' of wrappers, the 'dark and glamorous scent' of chocolate, the 'chomp[ing]' and gorg[ing] until disappointingly finding only the horrid Coffee Cream left. We all have those one in a chocolate box that we hate, after all.



'Harlem Sweeties' by Langston Hughes

This poem by Langston Hughes may initially seem like an account of a sweet shop in  Harlem, but you soon realise Hughes is writing about his admiration for women in the neighbourhood. Sweet treats, like chocolate, become representative of women of Hughes' admiration - it's a colourful and fast-paced poem (albeit, a little misogynistic). You can read it here.