A Poem For An Ending

The end of my second year at university is approaching (along with the looming dread of receiving exam results), and I thought this William Carlos Williams poem (which I read here) is apt for the occasion. The poem focuses on an issue many students have to deal with during their time at uni - the communal kitchen and the super awkward food theft situation. Whilst I've never had to deal with a kitchen thief (tips to my house mates), I have had to deal with some sticky situations when living with strangers in the past. 

I was tickled by the passive aggressive tone of 'In The Dorm's Communal Kitchen' ('hope you enjoyed them I guess') and the note-on-the-fridge-door format. Needless to say, hope they paid him back for the plums!

This is just to say
to whoever ate the plums
in the icebox
you could have just asked me if you could have one
my name was on the box
and i don’t have a meal plan
that was literally all i had to eat for the weekend and I was saving them for breakfast
so i hope you enjoyed them i guess
next time just ask

and honestly i would really
appreciate it if
you would apologize
like
so much depends upon an apology
slipped under a dorm room door
after lights out

This is just to say
that like im not MAD per se
i just wish that people would be honest
i wish people would be honest when they took my food
be responsible for yourself

This is just to say
i think its really WEIRD
that whoever took my plums
(and honestly I would have said yes if you had ASKED ME)
isnt coming forward?

Deny yourself all
half things. Have it
or leave it.
But it will keep—or
it is not worth
the having.
Never start
anything you can’t
finish—please dont TAKE A BITE
OUT OF MY PLUMS
AND THEN PUT THEM BACK IN THE FRIDGE
I HONESTLY FEEL LIKE THIS IS GETTING PERSONAL
WE’RE IN COLLEGE
LETS BE ADULTS PLEASE
I REALLY DONT WANT TO HAVE TO TALK TO KELSEY ABOUT THIS
BUT I WILL

okay and now we’re graduating to my ice cream
i can’t forgive this
it was so sweet
and so cold
the ice cream that had my name on it
real cool guys
honestly that ice cream was like six dollars
that’s really messed up

New app will help you read a novel in under 90 minutes (a.k.a. the holy grail for English undergrads)

So, I think it's fair to say we can all admit to skimming through a book, racing through pages with only a glancing at words at the beginnings and ends of paragraphs (or chapters - I've tried this. Surprisingly not a great way to get to grips with Ulysses....). As an English undergraduate, with sometimes three or four books to read per week in preparation for lectures and seminars (I know, poor me), I am a bit guilty of speed reading (and then maybe looking up a book plot on the internet - shhhh don't tell!). Rest assured, I have definitely learnt some cruel lessons from reading fast and fleetingly - I have been that sole person in a seminar scratching my head when everyone else is discussing the BIGGEST plot twist that I, somehow, COMPLETELY missed.

Today, I have been reading about a new bit of technology that would help you read a novel in less than 90 minutes - perfect for the busy English or indeed any student! Spritz is a new app designed to help you read fast - because, let's face it, as much as I would love to spend hours reading for leisure, life gets really busy.

Developed through research into how we read and reading techniques, Spritzing means you will not have to move your eyes across a page, therefore seriously cutting down your reading time. It's been described as an 'extremely efficient, precise, convenient and comfortable' method.

Don't believe me? You can test Spritz on this website: http://www.spritzinc.com/the-science/

Although Spritz may not appeal to everyone (because what's better than taking your time with a really good book?) there's definitely a target audience out there for this app: the lazy, unorganised student with lots of reading but not enough time!